Kimberly Willis Holt

It was an old story. They’d both heard the tale many times. But a good story traveled like water, constantly flowing, making rivers from one person to the next, returning and filling them up all over again (p. 305).

Those are the closing words in Kimberly Willis Holt's The Water Seeker. I love that image of a story as water, making rivers between us, filling us up and "constantly flowing". It is such a good description, isn't it?  Those very same words could also be used to describe Kimberly Willis Holt and her recent visit to our little base school here in Sicily. Her words both spoken and written moved through our community with the force of a pulsating river overflowing with energy, wisdom, wit, and kindness. 

We initially contacted Kimberly because of her connection to the military. She was a military child herself, who then grew up to become an award winning author, who then went on to right a fabulous series of chapters books about a spunky Navy kid named Piper Reed. Our family first became acquainted with Piper during Adam's deployment. Noah was five years old at the time and I was actively seeking out books related to deployment. I hate say it but most of those deployment books were pretty disappointing...weak writing, poor illustrations, too mushy, or too specific or too mature or too babyish or just plain boring...until we stumbled upon an audio version of Piper Reed, Navy Brat and I quickly realized that every military family should have the entire Piper Reed series on their bookshelf. Seriously, there aren't any other books out there that are as funny and or as real a portrayal of military family life as these. 

As part of our preparations for Kimberly's visit, the school librarian and I organized a Piper Reed Club for students in grades 2-5. We were shocked and thrilled when over 55 kids signed up. 55 kids voluntarily and enthusiastically gave up their lunch periods and recesses once a week to read and discuss the Piper Reed books. They laughed at the funny parts. There are lots of funny parts. And they spoke candidly and poignantly about how their experiences with deployments, PCSing (military term for moving every three years), and living overseas mirrored Piper's experiences. They kept a group journal with questions they wanted to ask Kimberly during her visit. And they even co-authored a book about Piper Reed moving to Sicily based upon their collective experiences. Seeing this special group of students finally get to meet Kimberly in person was one of the highlights of the whole experience for me.

But Kimberly's work goes beyond the Piper Reed series both in terms of her writing and her impact on our students. During her three days at the school, she led the older students in intense two hour writing workshops and she spoke with all of the students (K-6th) about her journey to becoming a writer. She revealed that she still writes all of her first drafts by hand, that her first book was rejected 17 times before finally being accepted for publication, that she makes lists of words that appeal to her each day, and that her grandmother's clothesline has played a role in several of her books. She shared photos of her favorite writing spots, made us giggle with family stories, and emphasized the importance of careful observation and re-writing. Those nitty gritty details not only drew us all in and made us feel a personal connection to Kimberly, they also served as powerful reminders that success comes from hard work, passion, and determination. And that fostering success in others can be as simple as making the time to read a child's writing with true interest just as her science teacher did for Kimberly years ago. 


When I wrote the initial grant application to get funding for this author visit, I emphasized the enduring value of having the opportunity to hear a successful writer read their work aloud and speak about their experiences. This past Thursday was our final meeting for the Piper Reed Club. As part of our wrap up, we discussed Kimberly's visit. All of the kids were very enthusiastic about it, but one child's simple words went straight to my heart: "She told me I was a good writer". I am confident that fourth grade girl will never forget those words or the time she spent with Kimberly Willis Holt. I hope that those powerful words are now permanently lodged in a special place deep within her psyche and that they continue to give her hope and encouragement when she faces challenges, rejections, and hours of re-writes. Meeting authors in person is a pretty exciting experience, but meeting authors like Kimberly whose dedication and passion are so sincere, can truly a be a life shaping experience. 

If you haven't read anything by Kimberly Willis Holt, I highly recommend that you do. She has books that appeal to all ages from picture books to easy chapter books to novels. In addition to the Piper Reed books, I especially loved The Water Seeker (see another one of my favorite quotes here) and My Louisiana Sky. If you ever have the opportunity to hear one of Kimberly's presentations or readings, do not miss it. If you have a favorite author experience, please share it.

A Week

Hard to believe it has been a week since Adam's return. A week of catching up, lounging around the house, playing in the backyard, trips to the beach and the park, lots of laughing, hugging, and savoring family meals each night with everyone in their spots. Successful bread baking with this great recipe. Visiting with friends and neighbors.A date night (went to see Slumdog Millionaire...what an intense film). Soccer playing.Giggling. But it has also been a week of change and adjustment. Some changes have been very welcome. Dishes and laundry aren't so overwhelming with another set of hands. Bedtime runs much smoother with Daddy home. We have had some significant set backs with potty issues but I am confident that will resolve once Camille is feeling more secure about Adam's return. I keep pinching myself. I can relate to some of Camille's anxiety. Hard to believe that he is really back,that the deployment is over, that things are so good.What a week. A good week.

And we are about to start another good week. Headed to hunt for manatees and Mickey Mouse.

Bliss

An then at last our bliss full and perfect is. --Milton

Since Adam's return our days have blurred into one big happy moment after another. Thanks for all of the kind comments. Things are good, blissfully good.

Valentine's Day 2009

A special red, white, and blue day for us! Adam is home! Valentine's Day! Family Day! Love! Hope you all have a great weekend.

Home

Defining Home

Home. Going Home. Coming Home. Making a home. A word that has multiple meanings and intense emotions. Home has been on my brain and in my recent reading. I decided to participate in my first on-line book challenge. Basically, it means I read and review three books that fit this criteria. I have put off taking part in these "challenges" because it just seemed like too much pressure, too much obligation, but I have enjoyed seeing what others have been reading during this particular challenge. It turns out that my two most recent reads fit the criteria for the challenge and also seem to have some interesting connections in spite of their obvious generational and cultural differences.


I noticed Maya Angelou's book Letter to My Daughter sitting on the preschool director's desk. It was hard to miss the brightly colored mosaic on the cover. She let me borrow the book and I quickly gobbled it up (mostly because of the content, but as I started reading I realized that there is quite a bit of "filler"..empty pages between essays which give the illusion that it is a thicker volume). A series of essays/lessons that she shares as a collective gift to her "daughters" (all women). My favorite essay in the collection is the opening one about home, especially these words:

Thomas Wolfe warned in the title of America's great novel that "you can't go home again." I enjoyed the book but I never agreed with the title. I believe that one can never leave home. I believe one carries the shadows, the dreams, the fears and dragons of home under one's skin, at the extreme corners of one's eyes and possibly in the gristle of the earlobe (p.6).

With this opening essay on home, Angelou sets the stage for a collection of essays which are essentially glimpses into some of her own "gristle". An interesting and beautiful read but it left me wanting more and felt as if it ended too abruptly. Like Angelou, the narrator of A Map of Home also attempts to define "home" while examining the bits and pieces of her childhood. Nidali's mother is Greek-Egyptian, her father is Palestinian and she spent most of her childhood in Kuwait until the outbreak of the first Gulf War which ultimately resulted in a move to Texas. The novel is essentially a coming of age novel with the backdrop of war, intense cultural transitions and collisions, and the angst of adolescence. At times funny, gritty, heartbreaking and very hard to put down. A wonderful debut novel by Randa Jarrar. Here's what Nidali's father has to say about home:

There's no telling where home starts and where it ends (p. 193).

Home is a tricky thing to define but it's interesting to view it through different lenses. I'd recommend both of these books.

Day 223

Only a few more days until this deployment is done. I can't post any details about Adam's return and technically he isn't supposed to even tell me the specifics. For security reasons I am supposed to be contacted by someone from his command, but that never happened. So we devised a little code to convey the information (how else am I supposed to know when and where to pick him up? or was his command going to just call me a few hours before his arrival? ugh..one of those frustrating things about being a "dependent"). Turns out my de-coding skills need some work! He's coming home a day earlier than we thought!!!

And not a moment too soon...things continue to happen....the car was dead on Friday morning, I discovered termites in the back of the house this morning, one very bad haircut experience (me), and poor Noah was in the emergency room again last night. He got some bad cuts on his fingers from barnacle encrusted rocks....he was trying to retrieve some trash that an older boy had just thrown into the water. He is fine now and just bummed that he didn't get to return to the park, but it was nearly dark when we left the hospital. I had a long list in my head of all the things I wanted to get done around the house but I can tell already that I need to toss that list out of the window because it's not going to get done. Things seem to be falling apart but we just keep doing happy dances around the house because "Daddy is coming home!". Thanks to all of you who have helped us through this deployment. Thank you for the the friendship, the phone calls/letters/care packages/blog comments, the food, the babysitting, the commiserating, the support, and the encouragement. We could not have survived this deployment without all of the help from family, friends, and kind strangers.

Day 217

We made our countdown chain tonight (thanks for the Japanese paper links, Lisa). In a little over a week, we'll be welcoming Adam home. Adam called while we were doing a little grocery shopping today. He told Camille that he was coming home very soon and she started shouting throughout the store: "Woo hoo! My Daddy! My Daddy!". We got lots of stares but it really was very cute and as soon as I explained the reason for her celebratory shouting there were lots of smiles and congratulations. I am feeling pretty giddy tonight, too. Forget the disposal, the lock,the dirty house, the whining, the fussing...none of it matters as much as that homecoming just around the corner! The end is in sight and it feels so good.

Locksmith, Plumber, and Chocolate, Please!

Ugh! It's 10:30pm and I really wanted to be in bed by now. It's been a rough evening with too much fussing and whining (from all three of us). I really felt like a bad mama tonight. Camille locked the bathroom door and pulled it shut as she left the bathroom. I tried but couldn't pick it open...any tips? And I just emptied the fridge of last week's old food, poured it into the sink and discovered that our garbage disposal is dead. It already smells bad, but I can only imagine how rank it will be by the morning. I will try to scoop out as much as possible, but any tips for repairing a disposal? I am going to make myself a cup of tea, scrounge around for some hidden chocolate, and then I am headed to bed.

Day 200

We are in count down mode around here. In less than 30 days Adam will be home. In 20 days Noah will turn six. In less than a day we will have a new president. Time is a strange thing. There were moments when this deployment felt like it would never end. And of course those other moments when days just blurred into one another with an exhausted frenzy. Big things have happened in this chunk of deployment time. Noah started reading. He proudly told me the other night with some amazement: "I am reading in my mind now" (reading silently to himself). Camille is potty trained and getting more skilled at cutting at her own hair (two more times in the past week...she has some sort of scissor radar. I really have tried to hide all scissors from her). I'd like to say I have learned some snazzy new skills during this deployment, but the things I have learned to do aren't that impressive to most people (figuring out how to attach the external hard drive to the laptop, etc). The biggest thing for me has been acknowledging I really needed help and getting better at asking and accepting help from family, friends, and even total strangers.

Adam on the other hand has learned a snazzy new skill: woodworking and he has been spending long hours in the base wood shop producing some beautiful pieces. He has also been leading a very different lifestyle than us and I am starting to think about his transition home. The kids and I have pretty much maintained the same daily routine that we all had before the deployment, but Adam has spent the last seven months in a warped summer camp experience. Group living, group meals, group exercise, group recreation. He has had time for soccer,reading, movies, nightly conversations with adults, and a different type of work (emergency room vs. full scope family medicine). My friends who have gone through deployments always comment on the transition period after deployment. I am sure we will do fine but I won't be surprised by moments of tension and re-adjustment. So on this night before the Obama inauguration, I feel hopeful, excited, and anxious to get started with the next chapter. Ready to see this deployment come to an end. Anticipating and preparing for more transition. And finally truly counting down!

Day 181

Seems so appropriate on the last day of 2008 to be doing something that has become such a big part of our lives, especially this year: packing and preparing for another transition. Taking a quick break from the mounds of "stuff" that have accumulated since moving to Louisiana in July. We arrived with a three suitcases, some books, a few favorite kitchen items, and our pillows...now we have birthday gifts (why did I think a huge dollhouse would be a good gift for Camille? she loves it, but even when it is disassembled it is in a big box!) and holiday gifts (big garbage trucks are not so easy to disassemble!).

It doesn't matter how many times we've done this packing/moving business, it is still a lot of work and stress. The kids react in their own ways. Noah gets even more hyped up and energetic than usual. Camille gets whiny and clingy. And I get tired, frazzled and snappy. And this time is no different. And just as with other moves I always swear I will get started earlier and be more organized, but I don't and the end is always frantic. I don't like it and perhaps one day my mode of operation will change but right now it is actually a little layer of emotional protection. Because if I stop to think about what/who we are leaving behind in Louisiana I start to get very sad.

But I am not sad to be saying good-bye to 2008. This has been a big bad and very sad year for us. So I am going back to the boxes with the mantra that 2009 will be a better year and by the time we unpack all of this stuff we will already have entered that new year. 2009 will bring us back to Florida and back to being a family of four (can't wait for February!). 2009 will be the end of this deployment. 2009 will be our big move to Sicily. 2009 will be filled with all sorts of new adventures and we will hold on tight for the ride.

Day 155

Adam told me last week that his return date has now been set for the middle of February (so much better than March!). That happy news sent me to a giddy place. I spent several days smiling to myself, hugging the kids extra tight, and daydreaming about all of the good days ahead. But then those happy feelings were nudged a bit by other feelings. I suddenly missed Adam more than I have in the all of the past few months. Sounds crazy but I think I have been numbed a bit by living in survival mode. Now that the end of this deployment is within sight, I just want it to end and I want him home more than ever. I am sure some of these feelings are also related to the upcoming holidays. And in addition to those feelings of sadness and longing, I am also trying to keep myself calm in the face of another transition. The kids and I will be packing up and moving back right after the holidays. That means another long car trip, another period of re-adjustment, and hardest of all saying good-bye to family and friends here.

When we first arrived in Louisiana, the months ahead seemed so long and I made a list in my head of all the things we would do during that time. Places I loved as a kid that I wanted to share with my kids. People I wanted to see. Projects I thought I would do each night once the kids were in bed. Movies. Keeping in touch with friends with late night phone conversations. It just didn't happen the way I thought it would. I was too tired each night to do anything besides a little blogging and reading. I haven't had the attention span to focus on a movie in months. I have been bad about staying in touch with friends except for occasional e-mails. Our weekly schedules quickly got filled up with soccer and gymnastics. And I had to come to the realization that I am just not able to do everything right now. I am usually able to juggle many things at once. I am usually the one who volunteers for everything and starts up new projects/groups without a second thought. But right now I am not quite myself. These past six months, actually this whole year has really been hard. And I am still reeling from it. I am sure there are lessons to be learned from this past year. I am sure I have I grown stronger from the challenges and losses of this year. But right now I just feel drained and I am ready for a new year. And ready, more than ready for Adam to come home.

Day 127

Finally some good news to share. We found out that next summer we will be moving to Sicily, Italy! This exciting news should help me survive the final months of this deployment...daydreaming about European adventures, Italian delicacies, and the thrill of living overseas again. This is one of my favorite "stages" in the military wife cycle. This is the stage of anticipation and research. We finally move out of the limbo of not knowing where we will spend the next three years and move into excitement and preparation. Still too early to have to deal with all of the realities and stress of moving/PCSing, but not too early to start imagining all of the good things ahead. It's also the stage that prompts us to start doing all of the things we had planned on doing/seeing in our current duty station. This time it is especially bittersweet because the kids and I are in Louisiana with my family and it is sad to think that in the coming three years we won't be able to see our families as much (although we really hope we have lots of visitors...get those passports ready!). It means we will be making the most of this family time together.

Ever since we started this crazy life in the military, we have been hoping to get orders to Europe. Adam and I both lived/studied in Europe during our college/high school years but we haven't been back since that time and we have often fantasized about returning with the kids. I will be keeping my fingers crossed until we actually land in Italy. It is the military and things can always change. But for now I am enjoying the thrill of European daydreams. I have been following Karen's blog for awhile, but will now be studying it and anticipating her upcoming book. I have already put a couple of books on hold at the library and spent way too much time on-line looking at things like this and this and this.

In terms of deployment, things are continuing to move along. Feels like we have more of a rhythm . Some hard days, but most are just busy and full. Adam is enjoying a small break(R & R) courtesy of the military...that means he gets to visit another base! We continue to have pretty regular contact which has been good especially in the past week while he was negotiating our orders for Italy. When we are finally all home together, we will have lots to celebrate before the work of moving begins.

And Happy Veterans Day! Thank you to all who have and who currently serve.

Day 108

Just when I was starting to feel good about making it halfway through this deployment, that dreaded thing called "change" has to intervene. Adam told me today that his return date will probably be extended until March (he was originally scheduled to return in January). Nothing definite so I am trying not to get too upset by it. I just hate when plans get changed. We knew this could happen and it is part of the reason we didn't make a countdown chain. Some families make paper chains with links for each of the days until the military member returns home. In theory it sounds nice because it is a visual countdown, but the reality is that return dates are rarely set in stone and when dealing with kids (and mamas who like plans) it can make things feel even worse. I shouldn't be shocked or upset because it is common (especially these days) to have delayed returns or deployment extensions, but I can't help feeling bummed. Changes are such a big part of military life that I should be an old pro at dealing with the unexpected or the dreaded, but I am not.

And regarding this whole deployment thing...Camille is pissed. She has recently been very vocal about her anger. At Sunday School she suddenly made a loud announcement to all of the students and teacher: "I don't like my daddy because he never comes home from work". Not everyone knows our story so I can only imagine what thoughts crossed their minds, but poor Mei-Mei is just trying to make sense of all this. Living with her through this deployment is like witnessing emotional stages of deployment. She has now moved from sadness to anger. And I can understand. Actually in some ways I wish I could be as vocal as she is. Because on many levels I am also angry right now, too. Angry that my dad is really gone. Angry that Adam had to go at one of the worst times possible and that he is still gone. Angry that war happens. Angry that change happens.

Day 104

I think we are near the halfway point of this deployment and that feels good. Since we don't have an exact return date it is hard to pinpoint the halfway mark, but it gives me some comfort to think we are getting closer to the end. In honor of being smack in the middle of the deployment, here's a little list of things that have happened so far:

1 set of stitches (Noah got those yesterday from a freak accident with a folding chair)
1 potty trained monkey girl (hooray! no more diapers)
3 bad storms (Gustave, Ike, Fay)
3 new cell phones (dog attack and malfunctioned/cheaply made phones)
5 states since July (Florida, Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, Texas)
15 family members who now live down the street and give us lots of love and support
100 phone calls from Adam (give or take a few...nearly daily contact)
Too many pieces of dark chocolate to count

I have been reading a book recently which has really made me feel lucky about our current deployment experiences. "Founding Mothers" by Cokie Roberts is a fast (and at times jumpy) read about the women involved in the early days of our country. So many of the passages about the Revolutionary War make me realize how easy my modern experience with war and deployment is versus theirs.....in many cases multiple years of separation, smallpox, little to no communication with their spouses or the larger world, loss of children during childbirth or early illnesses, constant fear and worry about the future, keeping track of not only their children but also running farms and family businesses, all the while fending off or outsmarting British soldiers. Makes my challenges with solo potty training seem so trivial! Don't get me wrong I would much rather not be doing this whole deployment thing, but right now I am feeling very grateful that I didn't have to live through it during Revolutionary times! It kind of reminds me of a yiddish folk tale Noah likes called It Could Always Be Worse....it is all relative and sometimes it is so good to step back and get some perspective on it.

I also have to put a big plug in here for my family. Without my family (including my amazing in-laws), this deployment would be so much more challenging for us. The past twenty four hours are a testament to that. When Noah had his accident yesterday, I was able to pick up the phone and my aunt ran over to help me. She took Camille home with her while I took Noah to the emergency room. While at the hospital I was able to call my mom and she came to spend the night with us. Today another one of my aunts showed up at our house and she helped me with things around the apartment. Since getting married and moving around the globe, I have never had this luxury of being so close to my family and it has really made a big impact on me and the kids. The hardest thing about the end of this deployment will be moving away from family again. I love that my kids are exposed to so many different cultures and global experiences, but it also makes me sad they don't have the same family experiences I had as a child until now. It is so good to see them getting to know their great grandparents and all of the aunts, uncles, and cousins that surround us right now.

Day 71

It's that time again when we starting thinking and waiting to find out where we will be headed next summer courtesy of the Navy. But this is the first time we're going through this stage apart. In some ways this whole process of discussing where we will live is an on-going, ever present part of our existence as a military family. I jokingly wonder what we will talk about once we leave the military life behind since this discussion is such a big part of our lives...where will our next duty station be and ultimately where will we live when Adam gets out of the military? Whenever we travel we can't stop ourselves from evaluating each destination to see if it gets a spot on our "list". Whenever I get together with a group of military spouses it is inevitable that at some point in the conversation there will be some sort of discussion or comparison of various duty stations.

According to my theory of the military wife cycle , we are entering the third year which is filled with those liminal feelings of being "betwixt and between" two different places (our current duty station but also starting to plan and get excited for our new destination). But this time around the third year is much more complicated with both of us being in different places. One of my frustrations with the whole process is that it always seems more complex and mysterious than it should be. I don't envy the detailer (person in charge of making the assignments) especially during this time when there is such a high need for family docs and an increasing shortage, but I do wish there was more of a logical system. Adam spoke with earlier in the summer and he got us "penciled" in for a very exciting destination, but I am keeping my fingers crossed until the actual paperwork appears (hopefully in the coming month). So for now we wait to see where we will be sent next summer. This is always a period of anxious waiting, mixed with excitement about all the possibilities, and sadness as we look ahead to leaving family and friends again.

In some ways this deployment has dulled some of the anxiety of waiting to find out...I am just too busy and too exhausted to spend any extra time on worrying. Plus, I think we will make the best of whatever assignment we get. We have loved every place we have lived via the Navy (the Northwest, Japan, the Southeast) and if for some reason we were miserable at least we know it will only be for three years and then the cycle starts all over again.

With all of the recent storms and related cell phone issues in my part of the world combined with some Internet issues in his part of the world, Adam and I haven't been able to talk as often as before and that has me missing him even more. And for some reason Camille has recently become very convinced that Daddy is coming home soon...whenever the doorbell rings she thinks it's "Dada" and she got up from her nap yesterday looking for him. I can understand her feelings. I also feel like it's been enough time and he should be coming back soon, but we still have many more days to cross off the calendar.

Hurricane Thoughts

I had forgotten how exhausting these darn hurricanes can be...typhoons (even the super typhoons) in Okinawa were so much more relaxing. We would stock up on videos, junk food, and hunker down in our little concrete house to enjoy a day or two of serious down time while the 100 plus winds roared through the little island. We never boarded up or taped windows. Never lost electricity. And the day after the storm we would emerge to find sunny, breezy weather and a few downed branches. But hurricanes in Louisiana are a different.

Thanks to the modern technology we have many days of advance notice which prompts all of the prep work. The boarding up of windows, the clearing out of freezers, doing all of the laundry, stocking up on water and food, or in our case packing the car to leave town. And during the storm the challenge is trying to keep cabin fever at bay because the electricity usually goes out pretty early. But the hardest part of hurricanes seems to be after the storm. Living without electricity is not fun. The heat, the stickiness, the bugs...I don't know how people, especially women survived before air conditioning. Seriously, the thought of adding any additional layers to the bare minimum of t-shirts and shorts....how in the world could you wear panty hose or all of those petticoats without air conditioning?! I think air conditioning is part of the reason people now live longer than our ancestors. With air conditioning there must be fewer homicides and suicides, right? Has there ever been a study on that correlation?

In addition to the exhaustion, I had forgotten the sounds of hurricanes. Not just the sound of the wind and rain, but the post-hurricane sounds or lack of sound. During the first night after the storm I was struck by how quiet the world suddenly was...no cars on the road, no low level buzz of appliances, no tv, no phones and so dark. The day after brought the sound of generators throughout the neighborhood, rescue vehicles, helicopters (lots of helicopters both civilian and military), and people emerging from their homes to survey the damage. The third day became much noisier as we awoke to the sound of chain saws, utility trucks, and traffic.

Anyway, happy to report we survived Gustav and very happy to report we finally had electricity back last night. I feel so sorry for those in other areas still waiting for that modern miracle. Lots of clean up to be done in our yard, but feeling like we got very lucky with this storm. Could have been so much worse. Just hoping we don't get anymore during this hurricane season. And I had a good laugh when I saw the signs our neighbors put up on their house before evacuating (see above).

Getting Ready

Strange sense of deja vu as we prepare for Hurricane Gustave. Three years ago Noah and I were visiting from Japan when we had to evacuate for Hurricane Rita. Yesterday I had to go to three different gas stations before I found one that still had gas left (and the storm still hasn't even entered the Gulf of Mexico yet!). Water and batteries are getting hard to find on store shelves, boards are going up on windows, and people are debating whether they should stay or go. I am pretty sure the kids and I will be leaving so in anticipation of that I am doing laundry and starting to pack....clothes, fireproof safe with all of our important papers, books and more books, snack food, bottled water, night time bunnies, games, puzzles, and anything else that might things a little more comfortable. I still need to bring our plants and outdoor toys/furniture inside. I also need to get more cash and write down important phone numbers in case I can't access my cell phone. Not sure when I'll be posting again, but please send good thoughts to the Gulf Coast.

On a different topic but related to Louisiana... Noah's class has been studying the ocean. He has come home with all sorts of interesting facts and questions about ocean life. And today they completed their study of the ocean with a seafood feast. As with most things Louisiana it seems to come back to the food! So instead of doing something predictable like a field trip to an aquarium or beach, they had a fun afternoon eating shrimp, crabs, fish, and an ocean made of blue jello, gummy fish, and cool whip waves! Only in Louisiana.

Day 50

50 days into this deployment and things continue to be an adventure. We are waiting to hear how Tropical Storm Fay treated our house. We have amazing neighbors who spent yesterday sandbagging and pumping out water from our back patio...if they hadn't done that our living room and our newly installed wood floors would be sitting in water right now. So this morning I am anxiously waiting to hear from my neighbor and hoping the water didn't get in over night. I alternate between thinking "we are so lucky" (lucky to have such great neighbors) and "it's not fair" (why do crazy things keep happening to us?). So Day 50 could turn into one of great relief that the house is still in good shape or it could turn into a day of distress as I try to figure out how to repair a house three states away.

In contrast to the soggy situation in Florida, Adam seems to be doing well in the desert. He has started playing soccer (on a sand field) and that always makes him happy. We have had multiple Skype phone calls which always amaze me....feels like we are living in the time of the Jetsons! He has also discovered that for $3 a month he can make phone calls to my cell phone using Skype so that has been very nice. His work situation has improved with the arrival of more help. Eases my mind to know he is doing well.

And I think the kids and I are doing pretty well although we are eating too much junk food and I am caving into too many impulsive buys, especially for the kids. I was so determined that we would be living simply and frugally during this deployment, but feels like just the opposite is happening. I know it is a combination of convenience, exhaustion, and desire for "quick fixes" (like maybe this toy will bring about sibling harmony and endless joy!). The good news is the kids are enjoying school and I am also enjoying those windows of time for myself. Hope the next 50 days go by as quickly as the first 50.

Day 36

We have made it through our first month of deployment. Like most intense experiences...at alternating moments it feels like time is both flying and crawling by us. We had our first skype session this morning since Adam's arrival in Kuwait. It was so nice to see his face and Camille was so excited she started dancing around the room for him! He was able to "show" us around his new digs. When Adam first arrived in Kuwait, I have to admit I felt a little jealous...his reports of free Baskin Robbins and full laundry service made me wish I was the one getting deployed. But after getting a glimpse of his bunk, the shower curtain he has hung for privacy, hearing reports of power outages (not fun to live in a desert setting without air conditioning), and seeing how exhausted he looked...I am no longer jealous. I think I have been so focused on keeping things together on this end that I haven't really been able to comprehend what he might be experiencing. I am so grateful to have him in a relatively safe place that I just think of his time away as sort of an adult version of "going to camp"...but having a visual this morning I am realizing his "camp" experience isn't really that charming or appealing.

Tonight I am in the midst of getting things ready for Noah's first day of kindergarten. Feels kind of funny to have butterflies in my stomach, but I do. A mixture of excitement, tension, and sadness. Seems strange to be doing this milestone alone and I am sorry Adam won't be here tomorrow to bring Noah to school or hear his report of the first day while eating dinner together. Missing this small event makes me think of all the other deployed parents out there missing some of the most amazing "firsts" in their children lives...first smiles, first steps, first driving tests. I don't always support the actions or decisions of our government but I am always in awe and I always appreciate the sacrifices our soldiers make...sacrificing their safety, but also sacrificing some of those "firsts" that happen while they are gone. When I think about it that way, there will never be enough free ice cream to make up for missing those extraordinary moments.