Going Strong

Next week we will be celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary. It's been 10 years of happiness, growth, love, a few challenges, and many amazing adventures together. We have two great kids. We have lived in five very different parts of the world (New Orleans, Seattle, Okinawa, Jacksonville, Sicily). We have survived deployment, the loss of loved ones, spider bites, hurricanes , typhoons, a nightmare of a kitchen renovation, scary pregnancy complications, and an international adoption involving three countries and the U.S. Military. We have traveled, laughed, and always kept our family rule of dancing together in the kitchen even if we have been fighting. I can't imagine doing any of those things with anyone else. I truly love the man I married and the life we are living together.

Lately, I have been reminiscing about favorite moments together and flashing back to our wedding, but I have also been taking inventory. It started with the step stool in our laundry room.It is a white folding, metal step stool. Just like this one. It's very basic. Nothing fancy, but it is one of my favorite wedding gifts. It came from an older couple (friends of my parents) with a card explaining that they had also received a similar folding step stool as a wedding gift twenty years earlier. When they were newlyweds in the midst of unwrapping the more traditional gifts of china and crystal, they thought it was a very odd gift. And I have to admit we had the same thought as we opened ours, but their card went on to describe how they quickly realized it was actually a very useful gift. The card ended by wishing us many years of stability and happiness together. Who knew a step stool could have so much meaning to me ten years later? But, it does. We use it all the time and I am always grateful to that wise couple for such a practical and symbolic gift.

So the step stool made me think about other wedding gifts. Which gifts have lasted 10 years and continue to serve us well or make us happy and could I remember who had given them to us? I remember spending so much time doing that whole registry thing. Hemming and hawing over china patterns, towels, and kitchen gadgets. The towels are now worn thin and being used as cleaning rags. The plates from our china pattern get used every day so that is a good thing. And the kitchen gadgets have been slimmed down with each move to include only those things that I really use. Ten years ago when we were giddy with excitement and confidence, we ran through the store with that electronic scanner convinced we knew exactly what we needed to start our lives together. But really, it was those gifts that were not on the list that have become so much more valuable to me. It comes down to a mix of handmade and practical items. The handmade gifts of artwork,photography, pottery, our ketuba, my wedding dress made by my mom, the hand embroidered wedding sampler from my sister...all made and given with love. With every move, they give us an immediate feeling of home. I treasure those gifts.

And then there are the practical gifts, like the step stool. They aren't fancy or expensive things. They weren't on our registry, but they are gifts that we use on a near daily basis. Like these Dean and Deluca potholders. I am fully committed to them. They are perfect and I can't imagine ever using anything else. Not too bulky, never feel the heat, and I can throw them in the washer. This is going to sound so weird and juvenile, but if I could, I would marry them. Yes, that is how much Iove these potholders. Did I really just write that? And then there is the electronic tooth brush that seemed like a strange gift, until we started using it every day. And the garden tools. I use that shovel far more often than the crystal candy dish which is currently packed away in a storage unit.

I know that gifts shouldn't be the focus of weddings, but they are tangible reminders of those we love and the lessons we have learned from them. Wedding gifts can also be the source for laughter and eye-rolling. Like my friend who received what seemed like 25 identical casserole dishes. We spent the day before her wedding driving around trying to exchange some of them for more needed items. Another friend received an excessive amount of decorative serving trays. We received a ton of large serving bowls. Adam teases me about the bowls, but I actually use them pretty regularly. And then there is the chicken pitcher. It was a gift from a friend's parents. We just couldn't picture ourselves pouring fresh orange juice from the mouth of a chicken. Just wasn't our style and it seemed bizarre. We quickly found a new home for it. So when we moved to Sicily, we had to laugh because we were suddenly surrounded by chicken pitchers. It seems that it is a popular souvenir item. Who knew we would end up in the land of the chicken pitcher?!

As we prepare to celebrate our tenth anniversary, I am happy to report that our marriage is still going strong(just like the step stool) and although I toyed with the idea of getting a chicken pitcher to mark the occasion, we are actually going to be celebrating with a trip to Belgium and the Netherlands. And my mother is kindly giving us the gift of watching our children while we are gone. Much better than a chicken pitcher, don't you think?

Have any favorite wedding gifts or stories to share? Or have a gift you always give to newlyweds?