Real

March 21, 2009

Here's our kitchen. Yesterday (messy/real/every day) and last month (unusually clean) and hopefully by the time my book club arrives tonight it will be fairly neat. Our kitchen feels like an ocean with incoming and outgoing tides of clutter (dishes, mail, kids' school stuff, projects, etc). It's in constant use and it's the room where I feel like I spend the most amount of time doing the same tasks over and over again. I wish I could be more zen about it but to be honest I just can't find much enjoyment in the repetition. I wish I could say it's usually clutter-free, but the reality is it isn't. It's in constant flux.

A few months ago Sarah and I had some discussions about blogging and reality. I joked about perhaps the need to start a website where we could all post pics of our dirty toilets to counterbalance all of those inspiring "bliss blogs" that can sometimes bring up mixed feelings. But part of me was being serious. It reminds me of those moments in relationships when you move from one level to the next. When you allow a friend to see you cry or see your messy kitchen...it's a moment of trust, letting it all hang out, and then suddenly they aren't just a friend, but one of those close friends. And there is relief in knowing you aren't alone, you aren't weird, and you have a good friend. So in addition to showing you my messy kitchen, I am also going to show you a new flickr group devoted to documenting real life. Add your own pieces of reality or just visit it when you are feeling alone in the mess. And read this post by Stephani who started the group because she couldn't find her couch.

And speaking of reality. A good friend of mine me tipped me off to this month's issue of Real Simple which has a ton of cleaning suggestions. Some were things I already do...vinegar, baking soda, liquid castille soap....but who knew ketchup could be used to clean copper? and white bread for dusting? And thanks to all for the spring cleaning tips. I am making progress.
Anonymous said...

Oh, I'm so sure super-mom doesn't exist, or if she does, she has a babysitter, a maid, and also a driver. But blogging is like framing a photo: we make a decision on what to focus on, and what to leave blurry or omit completely (and there's a difference between moving the focal point of the camera to get a good shot, and staging a photo outright). Blogging is never the whole scene. I read bloggers who are more comfortable focusing on the shine, and bloggers who go deeper and explore the blurriness (the latter are the women that inspire me the most).

Dim Sum, Bagels, and Crawfish said...

Francesca, you have hit on something with the "blurriness". In blogging and in real life, we are all constantly editing, cropping, revealing, and omitting. Thanks for that thought.

Laurie said...

Hey Lucia -

No worries about the state of your kitchen when we arrive tonight. We'll have a good time no matter the setting. :-)

Tara said...

I love Stephani's flickr group- I've posted a few things. It is comforting to know that everyone has clutter, muudy boots and dirty dishes.

craftymama said...

oh my gosh- white bread for dusting???!!! i just laughed out loud, prompting my eldest to call down from upstairs, where he is supposed to be sleeping, "what's so funny?"

your kitchen is beautiful- clean or messy!

xo

Anonymous said...

Love the cluttered table. Makes me feel right at home. I'm in the middle of moving the office downstairs and making the office back into a dining room. OMG. I'm so grumpy and stressed and yet, it needs to be done. It just can't be done in one fail swoop without ignoring the kids for a few days. So, alas, it takes weeks. During those weeks, more clutter than usual is around. I'm so not zen right now. So, I feel your pain. Maybe I'll post the 'during' pictures so everyone can commiserate.

Jan

Anonymous said...

for you:
http://herecomesnumberthree.blogspot.com/2009/03/for-lucia-and-kelly.html

Karen said...

It's a good thing I have a lemon tree out back! (Although, not for long.. sigh) I had no idea about ketchup, but don't have any copper pans...

Dana said...

Lucia,
Thanks for sharing the flicker group. I think I share a little of the "blur" on the blog, but not all of it & certainly not any of it related to my husband. I'm not sure he would appreciate any such honesty. It is a bit of struggle deciding what is appropriate & what takes it too far for me -- especially when other people's feelings are involved. I mean I could write volumes . . . but I think some is best left for my private journal. You have inspired me to include a bit more of the less edited variety that is our life.
Dana

Anonymous said...

The clutter stresses me out too. But as a friend reminded me yesterday, when we're old ladies, we'll never regret the time we spent with our kids. And we probably won't be saying things like "Gosh, I wish my kitchen table had been cleaner."

Its reassuring to see some glimpses of real life. But it is also such a treat to see the clean, organized, beautiful, composed focal points in this world of aether. As long as we remember that it *IS* an edited perspective. A source of inspiration and not another bar by which to measure ourselves.

Corinne said...

I think you know how I feel about this subject :) I'm with you though - I REALLY agree about how close we feel to those people we trust enough to let them see our "real" lives

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